📖What to Say When You Talk to Your Self Book by Shad Helmstetter

David Guerrero -

Topic: Self-Talk, Mental Programming| Medium: Audible | Rating: 4/5

  • Sucess is all mental programming.
  • Our brain will accept the programming as fact.
  • What you believe it will create. It was no choice.
  • Before the age of 18 we were told no 148,000 thousand times.
  • Before the age of 18 we were told "Yes" "What you can do" - 3-4 times.
  • We have more negative programing - 77% of what we think is negative, counter-productive and works against us.
  • Power of repetition.
  • What if I had different beliefs?
  • Imagine if you didn’t have your self-doubt programming?
  • Creating positive lasting change - be ingrained in you, know how to ingrain it, new words by programming.
  • The brain accepts whatever you tell it, whatever your program.
  • Easier to talk about problems than exciting futures.
  • We cause our success and failure.

Steps that control programming:

  1. Behaviour - actions do or not do.
  2. Feelings - influences or actions.
  3. Attitude - good and bad.
  4. Beliefs - so powerful- does not require something to be true.
  5. Programming - what we are told to believe.

5 levels of self-talk:

  1. Negative acceptance - "I can’t". "I wish I could".
  2. Recognition and need to change - "I should", "I need". Creates a problem but not a solution. If you finish the sentence it’s a level 1. “I should be more positive…. But I’m not” --> creates guilt.
  3. Decision to change - "I never", "I no longer" e.g., "I no longer choose to be victim".
  4. "I do", "I can".
  5. "It is".

Brain elasticity:

  • Positive thinking = bigger left brain.
  • Negative thinking = bigger right brain.
  • Change the neurons!!
  • Mental apartment - furnished by hand me downs from people (their shit).
  • Clean out furniture - burn it, don’t pass it on.
  • Get new furniture.
  • External motivation is temporary.
  • It can’t be stored in the brain.
  • Be your own coach.
  • If it’s not simple it won’t work.

5 methods of self-talk:

  1. Silent - conscious and unconscious
  • “I am rich and will become richer by providing more value to the world”
  • “I am in control of my finances” “today especially”
  • “I love problems. I am capable and can conquer anything”
  • “Maintaining a 6 pack is easy for me”
  • “Losing weight is easy for me”
  • Complaining to others is not helpful - it doesn’t fix the situation - winners still have problems but they talk about them differently !!!!!!!!!!!!
  1. Self Conversation - out loud
  • Shower talk
  • Respond to yourself - what can you do today?!
  1. Self write - cards for each situation a read until the program goes away
  2. Self-talk
  3. Listen
  • Even if you didn’t believe your subconscious doesn’t care.
  • 85% of learning comes from listening.

Why better someone else?

  • We are more critical of our own voice.
  • Better to learn from someone else who knows the vocabulary.
  • LEARNING THE LANGUAGE OF SUCCESS.
  • Your past doesn’t matter - it’s about your programming now for your future.

Getting started:

  • Monitor - mindfulness being aware of being aware.
  • Once you recognise a negative thought - rewire it straight away.
  • Listen.
  • Repetition is key.
  • Start with programming. The rest will follow.
  • Recommended self-talk to get started: (1) Self-esteem; (2) Taking control of your life; (3) Setting goals.
  • First thing you recognise is the old programming arguing.
  • The right attitude affects your results.
  • Reframe problems as challenges.
  • Situational self talk.
  • Goal: make it a daily practice. Listen 15mins a day.

Habituate:

  • Frame in past tense.
  • Break down the habit from all angles.
  • Talk about the new and old habit.