📖 The Gap and the Gain by Sullivan & Hardy

Topic: Success | Medium: Audible | Rating: 5/5

The Gap and the Gain provides a simple (yet profound) framework on how to look at situations more positively, constructively and with gratitude.

The book made me realise I was in the Gap mindset a lot of the time. Even at times when I felt "successful". And it's amazing how a simple change in your perception can improve your mood and life satisfaction.

Highly recommend! :)

Three keynotes

1. Measure progress backward not against an ideal

Practices:

  • Have a planned response - You will fall into the gap from time to time. But is important to be self-aware and respond by turning that gap into a gain.
  • Nightly routine - every night record 3 gains for the day and 3 anticipated gains for the next day.
  • Serial gainer - transform every experience into a gain. The impact on your health, success and happiness will compound.

2. Ideals and goals provide motivation and direction

“I don’t think we set and achieve goals in an effort to become happy. We do it because we are happy and want to expand our happiness.”
“The ideal is like the sun that illuminates the path ahead of you to give you the encouragement to take the necessary steps to reach your destination.”
“An ideal can’t be measured. It’s there for emotional, psychological, and intellectual motivation, but it’s not there for measurement.”

3. Measure your own progress

“Comparison makes you unhappy, and there’s no end to comparison in the world, if that’s the path you choose."
“Measuring your own personal progress keeps you out of comparison with others.”

It's so hard not to compare in a world of social media and capitalism where followers, money and body image are glorified as a symbol of status. Like money, perception is relative. So it's important to live in our own world, and not one curated for consumerism.

A massive takeaway is to also measure the gain in others. Don't compare them to yourself, others or an ideal. It helps you appreciate that person a lot more.